Karma Police

I heard this Radiohead song on the radio last night as I was driving home from class. I rarely listen to the radio anymore because it mostly sucks, but I couldn't find my iPod and tuned to Lightning 100, my fave Nashville station that plays local bands and Jack Johnson and Bob Dylan and Snow Patrol. So fun! Anyway, I heard Karma Police, which I'm pretty sure came out like 15 years ago and I probably haven't heard it in 10 years. I forgot how much I love it and it got me thinking...

1) I think Radiohead was on to something - there should be karma police officers. I know that true believers/practicers of this believe there is a higher power who governs over the good and bad deeds of its followers. I think deep down, I believe this, too. You know, good things happen to those who wait and all that. What I am proposing, however, is some kind of government agency that speeds along the karmic process. You know, like how Santa has elves helping him make all the toys and he sends special elves to the malls to hear little kids' wishes. I'm just thinking that the karma gods should have officers of the law down here on earth to enforce the rules. I don't have all the logistics figured out just yet, it's still in an embryonic stage, but I think this has the potential to be huge. HUGE!

2) I remember an episode of Road Rules in which they played this song. It was way before they started voting people off and it got all nasty and incestuous. I think it was the season with Dan and Noah and Tara and Jon and one other girl whose name I can't remember. That was my favorite season, for sure. I wish they still had the good old fashioned RR and not these disgusting challenges. It used to be a show about diverse people coming together to bond for a couple of months in an RV and partaking in challenges that forced them to overcome their worst fears. There was some hooking up - not a ton, but I do remember Dan and Tara (I think) hooking up this season. Now it's just about catfighting and making money and bitch-slapping and trash-talking. Grr...

3) Also, whatever happened to Radiohead?

Me + Mother Nature = Bad Romance

It snowed here in Nashville yesterday and although we didn't exactly get the 6-10 inches the ever reliable weather.com predicted, there was plenty of the fluffy white stuff for sledding and ball-making. Now, I would like to make one thing clear, I don't hate snow. But it does have a time and a place and Nashville in late January is not it. I ventured out today for breakfast with a friend and it was quite the adventure. I consider myself a capable snowy weather driver and generally believe that my Civic can do anything she puts her mind to. However, I learned today that although I may be capable, 98% of people who live in Tennessee are not. It's not their fault, though, because apparently there's no such thing as a shovel or plow or salt here, and people don't know proper snowy driving etiquette (like don't come to a complete stop on the snow - ever). After a delicious Pancake Pantry breakfast, I'm home, safe and sound, with my snowed-in supplies - a case of Coke and plenty of Dunkin Donuts Cinnamon Spice coffee grounds. I want for nothing. Except maybe a hill on which to slide down. And for the maintenance people to splurge on a shovel.




My lone footprints on the sidewalk.

To Be Continued posts...continued

1) Since I know you're all very curious, I would like to inform you that I haven't seen my new furry friend since the initial sighting (hallucination?) the other night. I suppose we'll chalk this one up to sleep deprivation.

2) The 25th and final spot on my "How to Better Your Mood in 25 Songs or Less" remains vacant, yet the playlist fulfilled its lifelong purpose today. I wouldn't say I was in a bad mood, but grey and lackluster seem appropriate here. I jumped in the shower and cranked the playlist. My normally short shower (generally a song and a half) lasted eleven songs. Eleven! By Grace Kelly I had grabbed the purple Aussie Sleek and Straight conditioner bottle to belt into. Sometime before Spoon I traded it in for my Aveda shampoo bottle, more microphone shaped and easier to hold. Then, sometime between the Dandy Warhols and Usher my fingers started to prune and I was worried my neighbors would report me for being too loud. Alas, I exited the shower in an immeasurably happy mood. It works, I swear.

3) I would like to dedicate this update to my oldest and dearest friend, Katie. I know being a mother of two is going to be amazing but incredibly challenging and the least I can do (since I haven't sent little Ben a "welcome to this world" package yet) is update my blog so that when you begin Internetting again, you have something fun to read. Hugs and kisses!

Catching Up on Correspondence

Dear Mother Nature,

I know it's been a while since last we spoke, but I have a few things I'd like to discuss with you. First off, I would like to sincerely thank you for multiple 60+ degree days last week. I didn't even complain when it was cloudy and rainy and I couldn't actually enjoy the 62 degree heat. Secondly, I would like to take this opportunity to discuss my frustrations with you about that severe weather you gave us yesterday during the Colts game (Go Peyton!). Although the weather man promised they wouldn't interrupt the game to pinpoint where exactly the tornadoes were touching down, he did. I missed at least 2 plays, and that tornado was at least 15 miles away. Next time you plan on dropping twisters in the middle Tennessee viewing area, don't do it during a playoff game, the Superbowl, Ellen or The Office. And finally, I would like to address the the 30 degree temperature drop and the raging blizzard this afternoon. Was that really necessary? Yeah, I thought not.

Next time we speak, I do hope it's under better circumstances.

Kind regards,
Mal

My New Roommate

So, last night I was on my couch, reading some Sense and Sensibility and watching Jimmy Fallon write his thank-you notes, when I swear I saw something scurry across my kitchen floor. Now, it was after midnight and I was tired, so I ignored it. But then I swear, not two minutes later, I saw it scurry back. Naturally, I stood up on my couch, thinking that whatever this thing is couldn't possibly get to me if I was standing on the couch. I ran over the list of possibilities - mouse, my buddy Stanley the Slug, a giant spider, a dust ball - and realized I was a big chicken. I contemplated creating a barrier between my living room and kitchen so that whatever it was wouldn't be able to get me while I sleep. I thought about not going to sleep at all. I thought about calling Brother to come find it and deal with it, because he owes me big time. I thought about sleeping in my car, about moving. I finally went to bed at 3, with my ipod playing loudly and two fans whirring so I wouldn't hear any noises.

This morning (well, I didn't wake up until almost one, so technically it should be this afternoon) when I got up, I tiptoed into the kitchen and nothing looked out of sorts. Perhaps I am just paranoid and it was nothing but a shadow. Or, maybe it was a little mouse and I'll keep him as a pet and name him Fievel (what a cute little Mousekewitz he was). I'll keep you all posted...

iHeart playlists

It shouldn't be news to anyone that I'm not rich. Unfortunately, one of the downfalls to lacking funds is that certain things must be eliminated from one's budget. While some might call iTunes downloads frivolous, I call them a necessary element of my existence. I spend the majority of my free time reading or doing homework and background music is essential to providing the perfect atmosphere for my studies.

Lately, though, my iTunes library is looking a little anorexic. It's depressing, really, because my iPod and I were not on speaking terms for about two months, but we finally resolved our differences last week and now it's ready to download music again. The sad news is that I have no new music to download onto it. With my addiction to playlists not waning anytime soon, I am forced to take drastic measures.

I am recycling music. (No, I'm not illegally pirating music off Napster. How dare you think that - I'm not one to break laws. Except jaywalking, which I think is ridiculous. That is, until I get run over.)

I encourage you all to do what has become one of my new hobbies - recycling. I'm scouring all of my old albums, ones that didn't get the attention they likely deserved (yes, I'm talking to you Keane and Under the Iron Sea and Augustana and Can't Love, Can't Hurt) and making new playlists. It's quite fun and rather addicting. By adding three or four new songs to a bevy of old ones, I can compile a playlist suitable for any occasion. Seriously. I'm currently working on a new study mix and would be happy to share it with you when it has achieved perfection.

For now, I'll leave you with my recent successful playlist, How to Better Your Mood in 25 Songs or Less (it currently only has 24 songs because I can't quite narrow down that final song). It's perfection. Every single song on it makes me (and Boobie) smile. It's the only thing that got us through crazy two-days before Christmas shopping mall parking lots. If you need suggestions on what to add to your lists, lemme know. I would love to help. And by help, I mean I would love to avoid homework by doing pointless, menial tasks. Please, help me procrastinate.

1. Citizen Cope: Son's Gonna Rise
2. Taylor Swift: Picture to Burn (a classic off her 1st album)
3. Phantom Planet: California (Ahh, I miss the O.C.)
4. OneRepublic: All the Right Moves
5. Fall Out Boy: Sugar We're Going Down (love it mostly because I am reminded of the weird-ass video)
6. MIKA: Grace Kelly (if you haven't heard it, download it. It's awesome.)
7. Spoon: The Way We Get By
8. Sara Bareilles: Love Song (every good playlist needs a girl anthem)
9. Josh Kelley: Opposite of Me (every good playlist needs some JK)
10. The Dandy Warhols: We Used to Be Friends (because it's fun)
11. Usher: Yeah! (every good playlist needs some Usher and a song that you know almost every non-rapped word to)
12. Gavin DeGraw: In Love With a Girl (every good playlist needs some Gav)
13. Ashlee Simpson: Pieces of Me (a guilty pleasure and I'm not embarrassed to admit it)
14. All American Rejects: Dirty Little Secret (because we all have one...or twenty-seven)
15. Death Cab: The Sound of Settling (a fun littly ditty)
16. Carrie Underwood: Cowboy Casanova (because Tony Romo is a d-bag)
17. Fall Out Boy: Thnks fr Th Mmrs
18. NSYNC: It's Gonna Be Me (perfect for singing along and reminds me of my youth)
19. Mandy Moore: One Way or Another (decent cover, but highly recommend the original, too)
20. Jet: Are You Gonna Be My Girl
21. Gavin DeGraw: I Don't Want to Be
22. Bowling for Soup: Ohio-Come Back to Texas (because the Bush twins want you back)
23. Kings of Leon: Use Somebody (every good playlist needs a tune to rock out to)
24. The Killers: Mr. Brightside (another good tune to rock out to)
25. Currently taking suggestions for the final available slot.

My Pleasure

I've been on a cooking streak lately, so I haven't frequented my local Chick-Fil-A in some time. However, I was out running errands all day and decided I'd treat myself to a number one with no pickle and a Coke. The young man taking my order assured me it would be his pleasure to serve me at the window. And a pleasure it was.

I went about 2:00, so I am certain the drive-thru guy wasn't in high school, or maybe he is and is in that work-release program that lets students leave school early to work. Anyway, he was young and had an incredibly cute Southern drawl, which I run into quite often living in Tennessee, but for some reason, the accent and the dimples and the extra barbeque sauce packet made my heart go all aflutter.

I realize I'm too old to think 18-year-olds are cute. I'm also probably too old to think anyone under the age of 21 is cute, which causes a bit of a problem because I have a not-so-secret crush on Jacob from Twilight (which I blame on Boobie for forcing those movies on me over Christmas break) who may or may not be old enough to drive.

My point here is that I'm concerned, in my old age, that I'm turning into a cougar. I think I'm going to have to start hitting the IHOP around 4:00 to find men who are more age-appropriate for me.